Dancing among the flames

{repost from 8/19/2021}

I need to write tonight, I hope that’s OK.

And I want to share this picture. It’s a picture I’ve been wanting to share for many months. And also a picture I thought about always keeping private. So here we are. Please hold this moment gently. It is a picture that sums up our journey with brain cancer. A picture that prophecies what is to come from our story.

This exact time last year this picture was taken. It was right after dinner. Michael was sleeping, in and out of lucidity. His breathing was more than labored. It was getting rattled. If you know that sound, you know. Hospice was here earlier. He was still making faces at Lourdes. His nurse said she had never seen someone so close to death still so present in the here and now.

One foot in each world.

I was sitting next to him and I grabbed my Bible. I did one of those “open and point.” Rarely do I open and point. But this time I opened and pointed. And I landed directly upon Daniel 3.

The three in the fiery furnace.

Not burning. Not consumed. Miraculously dancing among the flames.

And God whispered “miracles.” He whispered other things, too. Things that strengthened me as I had to let go of my beloved.

And I read verses 56-88 through my tears, at his bedside. Proclaiming miracles from the Word.

But then later that night he was leaving us more. And later I will write about it. How the kids and I got to say goodbye. How saints and angels ministered to us. How we encountered the flight of a soul to it’s Creator.

But tonight this picture is a portrait of so many things (none of which I have more words for)…especially the thing that is miracles.

I don’t know when you will see us walking amongst the flames. I guess we’ve done that in some sense. But I’m talking about other things too. Real miracles. And this is why I write about the hard things, the sufferings, death. Because the glory you will see manifested from the death that is our beloved Michael, the death that was the 6 of us, will be so great that we will all praise Divine Providence together.

Just as Michael is praising Him now.

Just as the kids and I will as we dance amongst the flames.

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