A family resurrecting

{repost from 3/2021}

Praise be Jesus Christ when He allows you to enter in to His Passion. Praise be! Praise be when He kisses you with His nails and the scandal and the humiliations! Praise be in His holy silence. Praise be in the power that is all things contradictory to the world.

When He chooses you to walk His Way, to carry a piece of His beautiful Cross you will be changed. Glory and honor are no longer desirable. All that matters is getting so so close to Him on that Cross. All that matters is the Glory of His Father.

In the depths of this suffering that is losing my other half, my kids losing their dad, I am (we are), in brief moments, filled with with holy light of immense joy. Of that inner peace and touch of God that can only come from the kiss of the cross.

To have been chosen to walk this way of Jesus is a gift I cannot explain.

To know that Jesus loves me and my kids so much that He would allow us but a slight taste of His own Passion leaves me with an ironic gratitude that propels me to live solely for love of Him.

I always say I never would’ve chosen it, but now that I am here, I see. I see it all so much differently. I see that the things we avoid, namely suffering, persecution, loss, being forgotten, are the only means by which we can be perfected. I see that these are the seeds by which love of Him and the salvation of souls can be borne in eternal fruit.

And my beautiful babies! To see them embrace this cross with so much gentleness and love. Enduring things few know about on top of losing their dad. On their own volition sleeping without pillows (Avila) for those who have hurt them and taking cold showers (Levi and Maximilian) because that’s what men do and developing a strength (Lourdes) I never knew a child could posses.

The glory of this world lasts but for a moment. But the glory of the cross, for all eternity.

Oh Michael, my love, pray for us! You are so very much here with us and yet the cross without you is just too heavy. But Jesus is carrying it for us, too, and showing us how to carry it and someday the 6 of us will be reunited and our family resurrected.

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